Toni crossed another milestone this week. With 4 weeks of radiation treatments (and daily chemo) now completed, only 3 weeks of radiation/chemo are left to go. Following this regimen, there will be a two week break to let her heal a bit, and then 4 more weeks of the CMF infusions to bring her initial treatment program to an end. Still on track for the end of November or first week in December.
Of the "complications," Toni would probably say being tired (really tired) and the lymphedema in her right arm are the most notable. A recent blood test showed most everything seems to be ok. She has a significant Vitamin D deficiency. We are working on that. I would like to know where her iron levels are as well. Hopefully she can ask for that to be looked at in the next test as well.
Another snipet from the life and times of Toni and Bryan. Yesterday (Saturday) we went to our favorite Thai restaurant (Silver Spoon in Redmond, WA). Over the months we'll go there 3 times each month. Sometimes it seems like weekly, but probably not more that every other week. The food is just wonderful. Yet, that frequency and the fact that we go there on Saturdays when the restaurant has few customers has yielded an interesting relationship between Toni and I, and couple of Silver Spoon employees. Somehow, they see us coming when we park, and they will have a table selected for us with an ice tea for me and a lemonade for Toni. In addition, they have a small platter of vegetarian style fresh rolls with peanut sauce, either already on the table or being prepared in the kitchen. The fresh rolls are comprised of a Thai mix of lettuce, tofu, and other leafy vegetables rolled up and held together with a rice paper wrap. Dip that in there proprietary peanut sauce and you're hooked. They are just very kind to us.
Anyway, I told that story to tell this one... so while we are at the restaurant, out of the blue, she says "I'm tired." And the tears came. She laid her head on my shoulder as if to resign herself to how she felt. One of the reasons I like taking her to this restaurant is the way the food makes you feel. It is not heavy; instead it is invigorating. The strong mix of flavors and the spices awaken the taste buds and fill your soul with warmth. And it always seems to make her feel better. This time was no different. With a few bites, she was back and talkative. It is one of the few ways in which I can pick her up a bit.
There are many things I miss about Toni before this whole cancer thing started. Those are quite personal, and this is not the time nor the way I want to capture my thoughts. However, I am grateful to simply get a hug and hold her hand, and every weekend we lie next to each other and just talk, face to face. From time to time, fleating moments created by Toni provide me with promises that things will once again return to some sense of "before." I know that most of her health will return, save... her now life long effort to minimize her lymphedema and the threat of reoccurrence of the cancer. There are still the occasional moments when she laughs all out, when she dances to music (and let me tell you she can dance), or when she gets inspired to go places (because she thinks she has the energy to do so). I have learned to stop and enjoy those precious minutes of time and to imprint those images in my memory.
To lighten this blog up a bit... I made my own recipe for homemade ice cream. I have been working on the base flavor for sometime, tweaking the ingredients as I go. Needless to say, it put a smile on Toni's face as well. YES... another victory for me in making her feel better. I would like to share this recipe...but I might be on to something. But I will hint, that is all about organics and combination of flavors. More to come.
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